web1_NWS.jpg

Sunshine, hotter temperatures expected this week

web1_dorothy.jpg

On the Books: ‘The Invisibles’ proves a page turner

<p>More than a year ago, I had read of a place called <a href="http://www.driveatank.com/4-star/" target="_blank">Drive A Tank.</a></p><p>At this &#8220;tank camp&#8221; in Kasota, Minn., (its motto: &#8220;History. Power. Tanks.&#8221;) you can channel your inner Patton, Rommel, or in my case, <a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=mike+dukakis+and+tank&amp;rlz=1C1SFXN_enUS521US523&amp;tbm=isch&amp;tbo=u&amp;source=univ&amp;sa=X&amp;ei=xPRhVJnWNoeuyAT4voCwAQ&amp;ved=0CB8QsAQ&amp;biw=1440&amp;bih=799" target="_blank">Dukakis</a>.</p><p>Powerful rumbling machines that can obliterate whatever&#8217;s in their path?</p><p>A chance to do something completely different?</p><p>And a memorable way to celebrate my 50th birthday with my childhood chums?</p><p>A scheme was born!</p><p>My friends John and Pedro were daft enough to agree to my Walter Mitty adventure.</p><p>To get in the proper tank-driving mood, we visited the mammoth Mall of America in Bloomington, Minn., to catch the World War II tank drama &#8220;<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2713180/" target="_blank">Fury</a>&#8221; starring Brad Pitt.</p><p>The next morning, we drove an hour south, the flat farmlands of Minnesota punctuated occasionally by a roadside stand or a nature preserve.</p><p>Inspired by the movie the night before, we spent part of the trip brainstorming nicknames for ourselves: I was &#8220;Bushmeat,&#8221; (don&#8217;t ask); Pedro was &#8220;Gas Can&#8221; (really don&#8217;t ask) and John was the ever-fear-inspiring &#8220;Butter Sauce&#8221; because, John, like butter sauce, is addictive and bad for your health!</p><p>When we arrived, we had an hour-long history and safety orientation that was both alarming &#8212; we were told these were not Disney World rides, that these were killing machines and we would die indescribably horrible deaths if we did not follow instructions &#8212; and illuminating about the history of tanks.</p><p>We piled into a 5-ton Army transport truck, which drove us to a concrete barrier-enclosed pen that served as the starting place for the tank driving.</p><p>Seeing &#8220;my ride&#8221; &#8212; <a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=FV433+Abbot+SPG&amp;rlz=1C1SFXN_enUS521US523&amp;tbm=isch&amp;tbo=u&amp;source=univ&amp;sa=X&amp;ei=I41fVO7QPJGmyATEiIK4Bg&amp;ved=0CC8QsAQ&amp;biw=1440&amp;bih=799" target="_blank"> an FV433 Abbot SPG </a>&#8212; was a bit of a holy Moses moment.</p><p>With its squeaky rattling treads and stout turret, the Abbot was more compact than I imagined but no less fearsome.</p><p>I watched as other drivers climbed a ladder to reach the top of the tank, which drove off in a plume of dust. Then a DAT staffer with a clipboard called out my name. My moment of glory! To drive a tank!</p><p>I lowered myself into a narrow hatch into the controls of the Abbot (top speed of 29 mph).</p><p>Pedro and John were passengers in the rear. Like gophers, our heads stuck out from just the tops of the hatches.</p><p>For the record, the artillery function on the tanks was disabled so there was no chance of blowing things up.</p><p>A tank &#8220;commander&#8221; (a staffer of DAT) rode atop the tank offering me instructions. Essentially, the controls consisted of a gas pedal and two sticks that you used to steer and to brake.</p><p>And off we went for about 12 minutes on an unpaved path, through a small water obstacle and back to our starting point. It was exhilarating to hear this machine snort and chug under my control!</p><p>Next was an <a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=FV433+Abbot+SPG&amp;rlz=1C1SFXN_enUS521US523&amp;tbm=isch&amp;tbo=u&amp;source=univ&amp;sa=X&amp;ei=I41fVO7QPJGmyATEiIK4Bg&amp;ved=0CC8QsAQ&amp;biw=1440&amp;bih=799#tbm=isch&amp;q=FV432+APC+" target="_blank">FV432 APC </a>(armored personnel carrier) with a top speed of 32 mph. I drove this one in &#8220;combat mode,&#8221; which meant I lowered myself into a narrow portal, with the hatch closed and my view was through a periscope!</p><p>It was hot, noisy and claustrophobic.</p><p>Pedro and John again were passengers, but they were enclosed in what amounted to a darkened vault in the rear of the vehicle. They said I drove this one much more smoothly than the first.</p><p>So I learned how to drive a tank. But the more enduring lesson was about the importance of having best friends willing (and crazy enough) to help you fulfill your dreams!</p><style>
.neFileBlock {
	margin-bottom: 20px;
}
.neFileBlock p {
	margin: 0px 0px 0px 0px;
}
.neFileBlock .neFile {
	border-bottom: 1px dotted #aaa;
	padding-bottom: 5px;
	padding-top: 10px;
}
.neFileBlock .neCaption {
	font-size: 85%;
}
</style>
<div class='neFileBlock'>
<div class="neFile"><img class="neImage" src="https://www.timesleader.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/web1_mele5.jpg">
<div class="neCaption"></div></div><div class="metaInfo"><photo0>https://www.timesleader.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/web1_mele5.jpg</photo0><caption0></caption0><photoCredit0></photoCredit0></div></div>
<div class="metaInfo"><bylineMeta><p>By Christopher Mele</p><p>Mele&#8217;s Musings</p></bylineMeta></div><div class="metaInfo"><factboxMeta><p>About Men Radio is a show about men. Not all men, mind you, but specifically about a group of lifelong friends coping with rapidly changing gender roles and how they interact with their partners, their kids, their co-workers and each other. It&#8217;s funny, feisty, smart-assed and very, very real. To learn more, go to <a href="http://aboutmenshow.com/" target="_blank">aboutmenshow.com</a>.</p></factboxMeta></div><div class="metaInfo"><shirttailMeta><p>Christopher Mele is married and the proud dad of two sons and two adult stepchildren, all of whom have given him prematurely white hair. His childhood in the Bronx defined his friendships, which endure today and for which he is grateful. A career newsman, writer and editor, the Lords Valley resident is glad for the opportunity to share stories and insights about the challenges that the modern-day middle-aged guy faces in the world.</p></shirttailMeta></div>

Mele’s Musings: For my birthday, I drove a tank