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Amish Cook: Gloria’s breakfast haystacks

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New Employment Opportunity and Training Center executive director Linda Ciampi to be introduced to non-profit community during ‘Meet and Mingle’ benefit at The Vault Tap & Kitchen in Scranton

<p>WILKES-BARRE &#8212; Back in the 1960s, comedian George Carlin performed a character named Al Sleet, your hippy dippy weatherman.</p><p>Carlin would offer the funniest weather forecasts ever, poking fun at the sometimes inaccuracy of those predictions.</p><p>&#8220;I guess many of you were surprised by the weather over the weekend,&#8221; Al Sleet would say. &#8220;Especially if you watched my forecast Friday night.&#8221;</p><p>He would then apologize to &#8220;the former residents&#8221; of a town in Oklahoma, which had been flooded.</p><p>&#8220;Caught them by surprise, man,&#8221; Al would say.</p><p>On one memorable appearance on &#8220;The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson&#8221; in 1966, Carlin broke into his Al Sleet character. His forecast noted the radar was picking up a line of thundershowers over southern Pennsylvania and New Jersey.</p><p>&#8220;However,&#8221; Al continued, &#8220;the radar is also picking up a squadron of Russian ICBMs. So I wouldn&#8217;t sweat the thundershowers.&#8221;</p><p>Classic comedy. Classic weather forecasting. Classic putting things into perspective.</p><p>Here we are some 50 years later and weather paranoia is at an all-time high. The latest fear is over the forecast of snow for the coming weekend.</p><p>Imagine that? Snow in Northeastern Pennsylvania in the middle of January?</p><p>Grocery stores have been selling food staples like there&#8217;s no tomorrow. People are so fearful of this predicted snowstorm they are purchasing everything they could possibly need to survive this snowfall.</p><p>Depending on where you get your weather forecasts, we&#8217;re hearing anywhere from one inch to a few feet of the white stuff could fall Friday into Saturday. Talk about hedging your bets.</p><p>Even if we get the maximum amount predicted, so what? Here are a few facts about snow:</p><p>&#8226; It melts.</p><p>&#8226; It can be moved via shovel, snowblower or snowplow.</p><p>&#8226; It can be driven on, walked on, skied on, played on and sled-ridden on. You can even build a fort and have a snowball fight.</p><p>Snow can also inject the economy, especially in this region. And it could cause school closings, work delays, services adjusted and, when melting, concern for flash flooding.</p><p>The reason we know all this is because it has happened before &#8212; many, many times. This is Northeastern Pennsylvania. Snowfalls are the usual. Winters without snow are an exception.</p><p>So why this over-concern for what we all know is a winter eventuality?</p><p>This area has become so weather-focused, it&#8217;s scary. Newscasts can&#8217;t begin to tell us the real news until we&#8217;re given a weather update. We must be told if it&#8217;s going to be cold or if a warming trend is on the way. We absolutely need to know whether it&#8217;s going to rain. And, Mr. or Ms. Weatherperson, could you please tell us exactly what time this will happen?</p><p>Whyyyyyyy?</p><p>It drives me crazy. Especially if I&#8217;m waiting to hear news &#8212; real news. I have to sit through a few minutes, which seem like hours, as I&#8217;m told what I already know by looking out my window or stepping out my front door.</p><p>Weather happens. It happens every day. We can&#8217;t do a thing about it. What we need to do is cope with it. We need to dress warmer when it&#8217;s cold. We need to wear waterproof coats and shoes when it rains and carry an umbrella. And we need to clear our sidewalks and driveways when it snows.</p><p>This is how we live in this region.</p><p>When school is cancelled, parents should look for ways to compensate for the temporary loss of education. Allow the kids to get out and enjoy the snow, but make sure they don&#8217;t totally miss out on learning for the day or days because school districts can&#8217;t risk liability for sending buses out in the snow.</p><p>There are times when we need to know what could happen weather-wise. And that information should be provided, such as the possibility of small stream flooding, rising river levels and closed highways, schools and businesses. When weather affects our daily lives, we need to know.</p><p>All too often, weather forecasts can be weapons of spreading fear. Often times, it&#8217;s not as bad as predicted. Sometimes, it&#8217;s worse. As far as snowfall is concerned, really, what can we do about it?</p><p>It&#8217;s either going to snow and accumulate, or it&#8217;s not. All we can do is keep after it. Sure, it&#8217;s an inconvenience. It can be a cause for concern. Precautions should be taken. Hot chocolate needs to be on the menu.</p><p>It&#8217;s called life in the northeast.</p><style>
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<div class="neCaption">Bill O&#8217;Boyle </div></div><div class="metaInfo"><photo0>https://www.timesleader.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/web1_Oboyle_Bill-2-1-13.jpg</photo0><caption0>Bill O&#8217;Boyle </caption0><photoCredit0></photoCredit0></div><div class="neFile"><img class="neImage" src="https://www.timesleader.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/web1_TTL01XX16Glubbers2ad.jpg">
<div class="neCaption">Children enjoy making snow angels during a recent snowfall. </div></div><div class="metaInfo"><photo1>https://www.timesleader.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/web1_TTL01XX16Glubbers2ad.jpg</photo1><caption1>Children enjoy making snow angels during a recent snowfall. </caption1><photoCredit1></photoCredit1></div></div>
<div class="metaInfo"><bylineMeta><p>By Bill O&#8217;Boyle</p><p>boboyle@www.timesleader.com</p></bylineMeta></div><div class="metaInfo"><shirttailMeta><p>Reach Bill O&#8217;Boyle at 570-991-6118 or on Twitter @TLBillOBoyle.</p></shirttailMeta></div>

In Focus: Don’t sweat the snow, no matter how much we get