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Happy birthday Austin Dennis!

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Irene G. Latsko celebrates 95 years

<p>I signed up for a Spartan Race for Sept. 24. Something about the date bothered me.</p><p>I felt like I was forgetting an anniversary or a birthday, but that wasn&#8217;t the case. Still, deep down, I knew that date had significant meaning.</p><p>Then it hit me.</p><p>That date will mark 16 years since my mother died.</p><p>I only became okay talking about the subject a few years ago. Discussing it in detail used to bring up too much pain and anger.</p><p>Sitting down to write about it took real effort.</p><p>Everything changed for me on Sept. 24, 2000. Mom&#8217;s death was something straight out of left field &#8212; one day she was here and life was good; the next day, my family and I were left picking up the pieces and trying to make sense out of a tragedy.</p><p>I&#8217;m convinced my mother&#8217;s death mentally aged me 30 years within the span of a week. I was a spoiled brat who finally saw how quickly life can change. Her death forced me to grow up.</p><p>My dad and I had a lot of adjustments to make after Mom died. He went from being the breadwinner of the house to balancing that responsibility with being a single parent. A lot of sacrifices had to be made.</p><p>I also had to become an independent kid &#8212; if Dad had to work later than usual, I had to know how to feed myself and get my homework done without being told. I also had to be able to wake up and get myself on the bus in the morning so Dad could get to work on time.</p><p>Into middle and high school, my dad reinforced my independence with his trust. I never had a curfew and I didn&#8217;t have a lot of rules to follow. Before I went out with the guys, Dad would always tell me &#8220;make good decisions and, if you make bad ones, you better be ready to explain yourself and live with them.&#8221;</p><p>That trust was something I dared not betray because I knew how important it was. It still is to this day.</p><p>As much as Dad trusted me to make the right decisions, I always felt a personal responsibility to look out for him. My family would always tell me &#8220;you take care of your father&#8221; at family functions. That&#8217;s something I never took lightly. We needed each other to navigate through our new lives.</p><p>I chose to be a lone wolf throughout most of high school and into college. I partially attribute that to Mom&#8217;s death and because I never cared for the typical high school drama. I had my close group of friends and relationships, but getting into the circle wasn&#8217;t easy. Keeping people at arm&#8217;s length was safe for me.</p><p>It took me up until graduating college and starting life as an adult to realize how lonely that lifestyle is.</p><p>Although it&#8217;s been 16 years since Mom died, it sometimes feels like it happened yesterday &#8212; I can remember a lot of specific details from that day, and obviously, a lot of pain comes with those memories.</p><p>I look at photos of me when I was a kid and realize how much her death has affected me. I feel like my childhood was cut dramatically short. I also hate being defined by anything, and I&#8217;ve always been a firm believer I am responsible for my own definition.</p><p>But if something as traumatic as the death of my mother had no effect on me, I&#8217;d need to check my pulse. Even though I&#8217;ll be 27 years old in October, I feel like mom&#8217;s death is a wound that will never fully heal, and it took me a long time to come to terms with that.</p><p>I can&#8217;t help but be proud of how far I&#8217;ve come. I miss and think about my mom every day, but I&#8217;m sure she&#8217;d be proud of me, too.</p><p>Even if I&#8217;m usually overdue for a shave.</p><style>
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<div class="metaInfo"><bylineMeta><p>By Travis Kellar</p><p>tkellar@www.timesleader.com</p></bylineMeta></div><div class="metaInfo"><shirttailMeta><p>Reach Travis Kellar at 570-991-6389 or on Twitter @TLNews</p></shirttailMeta></div>

Beyond the Byline: Reflecting on losing a mother 16 years ago